Quotes From Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Quotes
Not sure why, but this movie just cracks me up. And I think it might be because not everyone has seen it and the way they talk makes it that much funnier, and what I mean is, the words they use, are funny

King Arthur: [after cutting off the Black Knight's arms] Look, you stupid, bastard. You've got no arms left
Black Knight: Yes I have
King Arthur: Look!
Black Knight: It's just a flesh wound

The Witch: I'm not a witch I'm not a witch

Sir Bedevere: But you're dressed as one

The Witch: *They* dressed me up like this

Crowd: We didn't! We didn't...

The Witch: And this isn't my nose. It's a false one

Sir Bedevere: [lifting up the false nose] Well?

Peasant 1: Well, we did do the nose

Sir Bedevere: The nose?

Peasant 1: And the hat. But she is a witch

Crowd: Yeah! Burn her! Burn her!

Sir Bedevere: Did you dress her up like this?

Peasant 1: No!

Peasant 3: Peasant 2: No!

Peasant 3: No!

Peasant 1: No!

Peasant 3: Peasant 2: No!

Peasant 1: Yes!

Peasant 2: Yes!

Peasant 1: Yeah a bit

Peasant 3: A bit!

Peasant 2: A bit

Peasant 1: But she has got a wart

King Arthur: I am your king
Woman: Well I didn't vote for you
King Arthur: You don't vote for kings
Woman: Well, how'd you become king then?
[angelic music]
King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king
Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords  is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate of the masses, not some farcical aquatic ceremony

Dennis: Oh, but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you

Dennis: Oh but if I went 'round saying I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away

Dennis: Come and see the violence inherent in the system. Help! Help! I'm being repressed!
King Arthur: Bloody peasant

Dennis: Oh, what a giveaway! Did you hear that? Did you hear that, eh? That's what I'm on about! Did you see him repressing me? You saw him, didn't you?