10 Sarcastic Pull-Over Excuses

One thing you do not want to do is annoy the cops. They pull you over for one reason or another. Sarcasm is not the thing to do when they are trying to do their job. Here are some sarcastic responses from people who have been pulled over.

1. A lucky coincidence...

-"Got pulled over once for no apparent reason. Officer says he clocked me doing 70 in a 55. I had cruise control on at 59 and both my car and Google maps told me I was under 60. I gave him such an, “are you f---ing stupid?” look. I’m not sure how it would have escalated, but at that exact moment my phone started screeching at me about an Amber Alert with a vehicle description similar to what I was driving. Things got cleared up pretty fast after that."—MostlyChaoticNeutral

2. A German point of view

-At least in germany you should always say no because otherwise whatever you did was intentionally. If you do it intentionally the situation gets worse for you."—MegaIngo

3. Paperwork always helps

-"In college one of my friends was Swiss-American. He had both an American and a Swiss drivers license. When pulled over for speeding, he would hand over the Swiss drivers license (which was a folded document the size of a high school diploma) and started with: “Was ist los, offizier?” (“What is wrong, officer?). Passengers were instructed to keep their mouth shut and smile like they didn’t comprehend anything.

100% effective. One cop just muttered “I wouldn’t even know how to fill out the paperwork."'—mykepagan

4. Never do this!

-'This should clear up our little misunderstanding’ As I hand them my get out of jail free card from my wallet."—averageredditcuck

5. Playing dumb is sometimes the best game to play

-"Well, if you don’t know, sir.. I’m afraid we’re both wasting our time."—RubyKitsune

6. If you follow the lead of police...

-"I once got pulled over for speeding behind a cop. I told him that I noticed I was behind a police officer and assumed we were traveling at a safe speed. He said “it’s on me this time,” and I didn’t get a ticket."—thecatbeans

7. Judge to the rescue!

-"So this story is about my mom when she was pregnant with me.

At 8 months pregnant, my mom has been suffering almost constant migraines that make her so nauseous. She gets permission to leave work early one day because she’s been throwing up. My poor sick mother said “F--- the speed limit!” And took off home. A Maryland state trooper pulls my mother over for going 55 in a 35. He comes up to her window and she rolls it down and says “Officer I know I’m speeding I live just down there, I’m going to throw up, please let me puke at my house.” The officer starts getting super upset at my mom, and asks for her license and registration. My mom opens her door and pukes on his shoes. She gets a ticket, and has to go to court.

In court, the officer also wants my mom to replace his shoes. The judge goes “You saw a woman that pregnant who said she was nauseous, and still insisted on stopping her? You’re such an a--.” And dismisses the ticket.

I’m 25 now and it’s my mom’s favorite story about her pregnancy with me."—slightlyslytherin

8. Truth will always work

-"Because it’d be really difficult having this conversation while driving."—drdoom

9. Polite manners always work

-"The last time I got pulled over, I was in a small town and he was super nice. He flat out told me that he got me doing 55 in a 45. I was from out of town and told him he was right, that I had missed the speed limit change and that my wife had just warned me. 5 seconds later, I would have been legal had he been sitting there or not. He handed me a warning and told us to have a safe day. I was there maybe 5 minutes."—angmarsilar

10. No sir!

-"No, sir.” That is the correct response. Even if you’re doing 90 in a 15 with a kilo of coke strapped to the roof. “No, sir.” They’re fishing. And the question is either absurd or condescending, depending on how you look at it."—ph33randloathing

12 Pro Wrestling Controversies

We all know wrestling is not real. That tension you see between the wrestlers is sometimes fake, sometimes real. But the world of wrestling is not without occasional controversy. Here are some of those controversies.

1. The Montreal Screwjob was and STILL IS the biggest screw-over in the history of wrestling

-For those unfamiliar with wrestling terminology, "screwjob" refers to a last minute change in the closing move made by one wrestler on another. In this famous case, World Wrestling Federation champion Bret "The Hitman" Hart was arguably one of the biggest and most successful wrestlers. He was due to start working with World Championship Wrestling in December 1997. It was due to issues he was having with WWF chairman Vince McMahon.

-Being the reigning champion, he was told that he would have to face his ultimate rival, pretty boy Shawn "Heartbreak Kid" Michaels. The face-off match would be Survivor Series '97 in Montreal on Nov. 9, 1997. The script was simple; Hart would lose the title of World Wrestling Federation champion to Michaels. But it was not that easy. Hart - a proud Canadian - refused to lose to someone he thought of as arrogant, on Canadian soil in front of his fans. He believed that if he lost on Canadian soil, his reputation would take a serious hit. Alternative wrestlers were suggested, including switching out Shawn Michaels for Stone Cold Steve Austin or he could drop the title to Michaels in Detroit on Nov. 6. But McMahon and Hart couldn't agree on any of those ideas. This simple disagreement led to one of the biggest controversies in wrestling history - The Montreal Screwjob. One week prior to this, Vince McMahon, Shawn Michaels and another executive had a phone call planning out what would go down, how to get the title away from Hart.

-Shawn Michaels, Bret Hart and producer Pat Patterson met before the match to discuss how it would go. Shawn Michaels gave an interview in 2019 to ESPN.com about it. He spoke candidly about how he felt about his involvement in a plan that basically stabbed Bret Hart in the back. "[It] was just an uncomfortable day knowing what you know, [how others] assume it's going to happen, and then you having to be the one to orchestrate it all...It's one thing to make the decision to do this. It's a whole 'nother thing to actually have the person to make it happen and not have any idea about how you're going to go about doing that. And then, even if you are successful, it's absolutely going to be the worst thing that could ever happen to you...From a professional standpoint, reputation standpoint, even though I wasn't the most loveable guy back then, it was still just an absolute miserable day [a] very uncomfortable day."

-The plot of the match that Hart was aware of went like this: referee Earl Hebner was to be knocked down, Michaels would apply Bret's own move, the sharpshooter, against him, a second referee would enter the ring and the Hart Family and another wrestler named D-Generation X and start a fight. Instead, what really happened was that after Hebner got knocked down, he rose to his feet slowly as Michaels applied the sharpshooter move to Bret. As soon as Michaels had the move applied to Bret, he had to yell to Michaels that he had it wrong; it was supposed to be the other leg because Michaels had messed it up. Once Michaels had the sharpshooter move correctly applied, the referee rang the bell after Hart read McMahon's lips telling the ref to do so. Hart was declared the loser and Michaels declared the winner. Before leaving the ring, Hart spit right in McMahon's face, landing a direct hit with it

-The realization that Hart had been stabbed in the back by his soon to be former boss hit him like a freight train. Michaels, as the plan went, acted as if he knew nothing. When McMahon came back stage, he didn't see Hart; Bret was in the shower getting ready to leave. He came out, wrapped a towel he found on the floor around him and forcefully punched McMahon in the face. Because of this, the relationship between Hart and McMahon suffered badly. They didn't speak for more than five years. In 2000, Bret had retired from wrestling due to a severe concussion inflicted by wrestler Bill Goldberg and one of his famous powerful roundhouse kicks to the head. He was diagnosed with post-concussion syndrome. Bret mentioned that they began speaking to one another in 2002 after the WWE CEO called Hart in the hospital while he was recovering from a stroke. Bret Hart was inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame in 2006 and continued working for the company in 2009. Bret Hart hosted the Dec. 29, 2009 episode of Monday Night Raw and that's when the bitter rivalry between Bret "The Hitman" Hart and Shawn "The Heartbreak Kid" Michaels came to an end. As Hart mentioned in an article in the Calgary Herald in 2010 "My impression was that (Michaels) was actually pretty sincere. He apologized for a lot of what happened...I think it was like a million pounds off of his back...There was a couple of times when it looked like he was going to start crying. There was a lot of real emotion in that little segment...I think it was a surprise to him as much as to me."

2. Triple H simulating necrophilia in the story of Katie Vick

-This is certainly one of the strangest and yet sadder stories to emerge from the world of WWE. It came in 2002 and involved wrestlers Triple H, Kane and a woman named Katie Vick. The story was born on Oct. 7, 2002, on that night's episode of Monday Night Raw. Triple H approached Kane backstage and asked him if the name "Katie Vick" meant something to Kane. This implied Kane had a secret involving this woman. Prior the taping of the episode, Kane had revealed that Katie Vick was a high school friend of his, that she had died, but it was accidental. The wrestler said that they had gone out one night and he did the safe thing by offering to drive Vick home because she was intoxicated. He was unfamiliar with driving a stick shift car and he crashed Vick's car when an animal jumped into the path of the oncoming car. Kane survived, but Vick was killed on impact

-Of course, Triple H didn't buy the innocent, just-trying-to-help-a-friend story. He implied Kane had also been under the influence and joked about Kane's love for his friend Vick. He even went so far as to accuse Kane of having intercourse with the deceased. A claim that angered Kane enough to leave the venue lest he do something he'd regret. On the Oct. 2, 2002 episode of Monday Night Raw, Triple H took it one step further. He came out wearing a Kane mask and was shown trying to seduce a woman lying in a casket that bore all too much resemblance to Katie Vick. This storyline had now hit the headlines. The story was supposed to be comical, but Vince McMahon wanted it more like a soap opera. Not surprisingly, a lot of WWE staffers had a bad taste in their mouth on this story. A lot of them quit because they probably felt that the death of a close friend is personal, not something to be milked for laughs. Years later, a former writer for WWE named David Lagana, tweeted that the stock for WWE was at the lowest price ever - $7.10 - in October 2002. A lot would say there is a coincidence here

3. Vince McMahon dying in a fiery explosion

-We all know WWE and the world of professional wrestling is full of drama. Like a hillbilly soap opera in the eyes of some. The storylines are more dramatic than those you would find on most daytime soap operas. WrestleMania 23 seen former US President Donald Trump and WWE boss Vince McMahon, both of whom are good friends with each other, getting hyped up for "Battle of the Billionaires". On the June 11, 2007 episode of Monday Night Raw, the entire episode was even called "Vince McMahon Appreciation Night", the episode consisted of various wrestlers calling him out on their poor treatment from him instead of praise for him. The episode ends with a saddened McMahon getting into his limo, closing the door, only to explode. The car bursts into flames before the scene fades to black. Many watching really believed that McMahon was dead.

-Triple H gave a 2008 interview on the Opie and Anthony Show. He admitted the skit was so realistic that if he had not seen the prior footage of McMahon getting in and out of the limo, he would have been scared his boss had actually been killed. Triple H said "What kills me is that so many people called [the WW headquarters], like Trump called and was like 'something happened to Vince'. That's the magic of television." The WWE treated his "death" as a legitimate news story. Some actually believe it happened. The next day, a press release was sent out stating McMahon was "presumed dead" and wondering who had planted the deadly bomb. A memorial was even scheduled for the June 25, 2007 episode of Monday Night Raw. Of course, there's always an angle with WWE. Sure enough, this time there was. The storyline goes that McMahon would reappear suddenly, admitting to faking his own death, with the help of an accomplice who would be pushed as the next big superstar for WWE.

-Of course, a REAL tragedy struck the day this fake "memorial" was to be held. World famous wrestler Chris Benoit was found by police. He was deceased. Instead of the fake tribute, a real tribute and memorial was held in honor of Benoit, with McMahon appearing and saying at the start of the show how he had to admit to faking his death.

4. How the steroid trials changed the world of wrestling forever

-The city of Hershey, PA usually creates images of chocolate everywhere, not human growth hormones and steroids. In the late 1980s to early 1990s, a doctor out of Hershey was on trial in a federal court room, accused of drug trafficking that nearly destroyed Vince McMahon. Dr. George Zahorian was a physician who worked ringside to tend to the various injuries wrestlers received. In 1984, he started supplying McMahon and wrestlers like Hulk Hogan, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, The Ultimate Warrior with steroids, human growth hormones and other substances. An investigation by the Justice Department revealed that from 1984-1989, Zahorian supplied 43 wrestlers, 37 of whom were employed by the WWF, with drugs designed to improve speed, healing and more, with out a prescription. The packages containing these drugs were sent to the wrestler's homes, to the venues and to the WWF headquarters in Connecticut

-In 1988, the trafficking of steroids became a large crime. Federal agents started investigating Dr. George Zahorian because he started selling to amateur bodybuilders, which McMahon and others in the WWF world didn't know. One of the people that Zahorian had sold drugs to was William Dunn, a government agent undercover as a bodybuilder. Zahorian was caught on tape, saying that Dunn "gave better prices than the wrestlers". The doctor was arrested and in March 1990, he was on trial accused of 15 counts of drug trafficking. June 1991 seen him convicted of at least 12 of these counts.

-His trial garnered major media attention due to his connection with the WWF. Four wrestlers, including "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, testified. Hulk Hogan's name appeared in the stories on the news, suggesting he used steroids. According to Bret Hart in his memoir Hitman, Hogan had used them from time to time to bulk up on muscle. Bret Hart only used steroids to try and heal from the various injuries he suffered. It wasn't until July 1991 that McMahon sent out a press release to the WWF that stated wrestlers would start being tested for steroids and other human growth hormones. This didn't stop the government from investigating. 1993 seen him being indicted on two counts of distributing steroids and one count of conspiracy to distribute steroids.

-July 1994 seen the trial for McMahon. Prosecutors hoped to show McMahon had required the wrestlers under his employment to use steroids. The main witness was Hulk Hogan, who was now working for rival wrestling company WCW. Hogan refused to implicate his former manager, stating that while he did use steroids, he had a prescription for it and a medical necessity for it. He had received them from Zahorian, but McMahon never asked him to take the steroids. He also stated McMahon never bought steroids on behalf of Hogan. Out of 11 wrestlers who testified, only one - Kevin Wacholz, aka "Nailz" - claimed the WWF manager had pressured him into using steroids. McMahon's attorney simply dismissed Wacholz's statement as someone looking for payback after being fired by the WWF. The trial ended with a "not guilty" verdict after the judge seen there was insufficient evidence that showed the trafficking occurred within the court's jurisdiction

5. New Jack really injured his opponent in the "Mass Transit" accident

Eric Kulas

Axl Rotten

D-Von Dudley

Jerome "New Jack" Young

The Gangstas: Mustafa Saed and Jerome "New Jack" Young

-1996 seen Extreme Championship Wrestling (ECW) being born. This world of wrestling was known for it's extremely violent, bloody matches. On Nov. 23, 1996, it was about to get even more violent and bloody. Eric Kulas was a 17 year old aspiring wrestler with a gimmick known as "Mass Transit", which was a spinoff of Jackie Gleason's character on The Honeymooners. The night of Nov. 23, 1996 seen him showing up at the ECW house with his gear, because it was normal for wrestling promoters to need extra hands on site. That's what happened that night. Axl Rotten was declared a no-show, which left ECW booker Paul Heyman without a tag team partner for that night's wrestler D-Von Dudley in his match against The Gangstas (Jerome "Jack" Young and Mustafa Saed). With his father's support and his father by his side, Kulas volunteered to take Rotten's place to keep the match on. Kulas had, of course, lied about his age in order to get this gig. He also lied about how famed wrestler Killer Kowalski had trained him

-Prior to the match, Kulas was warned that at some point in the match, he would "get color" or "bleed". He had never "bladed" or even cut himself before. He asked New Jack to do this for him. This was a bad idea; The Gangstas were known for extreme violence inside the ring. Kulas got the typical beating from New Jack and Saed, at one point hitting Kulas with toasters and crutches. Towards the end of the match, New Jack restrained Kulas and used a surgical scalpel to cut him across the forehead. The cut was deeper than expected; it severed two arteries and sending fresh blood over fans sitting ringside. Despite Kulas screaming in pain and his father yelling to end the match, New Jack and Saed continued beating him until paramedics entered the ring. Thankfully the match wasn't televised, but there was video footage of it on the ECW FanCam. While the footage did catch New Jack asking if Kulas was okay, it also caught very damning footage of New Jack saying into the microphone "I don't care if the motherf----er dies!"

-The aftermath of the match was one of high tension. The Kulas family appeared on the TV news show Inside Edition and showed the teenaged aspiring wrestler as a victim and blamed the ECW for not properly protecting him. Resulting from this, the ECW's pay-per-view provider refused to broadcast Barely Legal, which was supposed to be ECW's first PPV event. There was supposed to be a lawsuit against ECW, but it never came. The Kulas family did sue New Jack a few years later, charging him with assault and battery with a deadly weapon. He was acquitted after testimony proved that Kulas had asked New Jack to cut him and was proved accurate by other witnesses on the stand. Kulas was also shown to have lied about his age and wrestling training. When New Jack learned that Kulas had lied about being over 18 and about receiving training from Killer Kowalski, he stated he had zero remorse about what he had done. Of course, he still had zero tolerance or remorse for the aspiring wrestler. He even responded to the death of Eric Kulas years later when he died at age 22 from complications from gastric bypass surgery. "I hope he rots in motherf----ing hell, that fat b----rd!"

6. Muhammad Hassan and the Terrorism Controversy

-From 2004-2005, Marc Copani's wrestling angle was that of a Muslim-American WWE wrestler named Muhammad Hassan. He was shown as a villain, taking on wrestlers such as Hulk Hogan, The Undertaker. July 2005 seen him at the core of a controversy due to a skit that aired the same day of a major terrorist attack

-On July 7, 2005, Islamic terrorists pulled off four suicide attacks in London. Three of the bombings occurred on the Tube (subway system) during the heavy morning rush hour and the other on a red double-decker bus later that day. In addition to the terrorists who committed suicide, the bombings killed more than 50 UK citizens and injured an additional 700 people.

-That same day, US TV aired a WWE show where the Undertaker was assaulted by five people with masks and Hassan's manager treated as a martyr. Despite the fact the skit didn't air in the UK for obvious reasons, the US did include a broadcast warning on the content. The backlash it received in the aftermath of the London bombings was quick and harsh. The controversy caused rang the death knell for Muhammad Hassan. In a 2020 interview with Copani, he admitted that he didn't think a character like Hassan should be portrayed now. He told interviewer Chris Van Cliet. "I think [the way Hassan was portrayed] was insensitive. It became very insensitive towards Muslim Americans and Arab American people. The way that the character changed from being this Arab-American who was upset at the unjust treatment of his people to a more radicalized Muslim and Arab young man who was lashing out violently, I don't think that would be appropriate at this time. I don't think that would be fair to portray any Arab American or Muslim American in that way." Luckily, all's well that ends well for Copani. He had quit wrestling and took a position as a junior high school principal

7. Jeff Hardy was clearly intoxicated while wrestling

-February 2011 seen Jeff Hardy losing the Total Nonstop Action (TNA) World Heavyweight Championship belt to Sting. It was later proven he hadn't prepared for the match and was given no advance warning about who his opponent was, so a No Disqualification match was set. It was set for March 13 and would be a pay-per-view event called "The Victory Road".

-From the moment he showed up, it was clear something was off about him. Even the fans noticed something was awry about him. Referee Brian Hebner even put up an "X" sign before the match, signaling that Hardy was in no condition to wrestle. But the match still went on. It didn't last long, though. Two minutes into the match, Sting forcefully pinned Hardy to the mat. The ref counted Hardy out and once again, Hardy lost, with Sting retaining the title. The crowd or Hardy's opponent liked Hardy's behavior. One fan yelled "Bulls--!" Sting responded "I agree! I agree!"

-The day after, TNA sent Hardy home from that week's tapings of Impact. A few days later, "Immortal", a TNA alliance for wrestlers headed by Hulk Hogan and Impact's executive Eric Bischoff, both severed any connection with Hardy. Hardy didn't step into a ring until Sept. 8, 2011. He addressed the crowd on that episode of Impact. "The last time I was seen in this ring, I was pathetic. I was messed up! I had a main event match with a guy I've looked up to for a long time, and I failed miserably. I let everybody down. I can't change what happened at Victory Road, but I can admit that at Victory Road, I had hit rock bottom. I can't expect you [the fans] to forgive me and give me another chance...All I can do is ask. Give me one more shot." The crowd had forgiven him; they chanted "One more shot!

-Hardy continued wrestling, but his alcoholism was determined to win. His alcoholism was even introduced as a storyline in 2020. Meanwhile, Sting, his opponent from "Victory Road" holds no ill will against him. At the 2017 Wales Comic Con Q&A, Sting said "Jeff was in a bad way that day, and he was deteriorating as the hours went on. It got to a point where he was just not ready to wrestle. But you know what, since then, he's turned around, and life is great, and I respect Jeff and love his work and love Jeff, period. So I don't hold anything against him. I don't harbor anything against him, and I wish him the best."

8. On live TV, Hulk Hogan applied the chokehold to a TV host

-The first WrestleMania happened in 1985. The two main wrestlers were "Rowdy" Roddy Piper and "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndoff tag teaming against Hulk Hogan and Mr. T. To hype people up for the event, the wrestlers appeared on various talk shows through out the country. On the March 27, 1985 episode of WrestleMania, Hulk Hogan and Mr. T were on Hot Properties, hosted by Richard Belzer. According to their host, the show started off on a bad footing before the cameras event went on. A representative for Mr. T called the host, saying the actor would not appear on the show unless there were at least 50 kids - preferably disabled children - in the audience. A call was made and the producers got the required 50 disabled children.

-The interview seemed to be mostly with Hogan, not a lot of questions going to Mr. T. Belzer then asked for a demo on a wrestling move. Mr T. refused, but Hulk Hogan gladly accepted after pestering from Belzer. Hogan put him into a front chin hold, resulting in the host becoming unconscious. Hogan dropped him to the floor, which resulted in Belzer hitting his head on the floor. Obviously the kids were scared in the audience, but Mr. T and his wonderful ways with kids, assured them that the host was "just sleeping". Their host regained consciousness, but was bleeding from his head injury. He was taken to the hospital to be evaluated and received nine stitches to close the wound. In a 1990 interview with Roy Firestone, Belzer said "[Hogan said] 'Signal me if it hurts', right? So I try to signal, [Hogan] ignored it. Now here, I'm trying to signal and I have no strength, I'm limp, I'm gone."

-Despite the fact that Hogan apologized after saying he was experienced in working with professional wrestlers, Belzer sued Hogan, Mr. T, Vince McMahon and the WWF before settling out of court in 1989 for $5 million

9. Max Caster had to undergo sensitivity training after a controversial rap

-Max Caster was a rapper who was part of a tag team called "The Acclaimed" for All Elite Wrestling (AEW). His wrestling career came to a screeching halt when a rap he did had some controversial lyrics. On Aug. 3, 2021, on the episode of AEW Dark, Caster started rapping about his fellow AEW wrestlers the Sydals and Varsity Blonds as he and tag team partner Anthony Bowens came out to the ring. The lyrics referenced famous gymnast Simone Biles's mental health and the famous Duke lacrosse rape case. Bowens took the microphone and started rapping about a female wrestler's genitals. Social media took an instant dislike and the backlash was immediate. AEW pulled this episode from YouTube, replacing it with Caster's rap cut out. Tony Khan, the president of AEW, called the rap "terrible", telling Busted Open Radio that he had not gone over this rap with Caster prior to the performance as he normally did. He added that it should have been edited out before the episode was posted, but since it wasn't, he would personally take command of editing all AEW episodes from then on.

-In the days following, there were numerous reports stating whether Caster was suspended without pay from AEW for two months and ordered to take sensitivity training. "The Acclaimed" tag team was dissolved and Bowens became a single match wrestler

10. The LGBTQ community gets fired up over the onscreen marriage of Billy and Chuck

-2001 seen wrestler Chuck Palumbo leaving World Championship Wrestling (WCW) and going for its bigger rival, World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE). He was quickly paired with WWE wrestler Billy Gunn. They became a popular tag team, winning the World Tag Team Championships twice. As time went on, they started showing romantic interest in each other. They both had bleached blonde hair and even started wearing matching red uniforms. September 2002 seen Billy accepting Chuck's proposal to be his partner. September 12, 2002 seen their commitment ceremony being aired on SmackDown! During the ceremony, they revealed their relationship was fake. Nothing more than a storyline to promote the WWE. They both stated neither of them were homosexual. The deception angered GLAAD, which had worked closely with the WWE on the story and even helped arrange for mainstream coverage on this. Spokesperson Scott Seomin had this to say. "We supported the representation of Billy & Chuck, NOT the called-off wedding. The WWE lied to us to months ago when they promised that Billy & Chuck would come out and wed on the air. In fact, [Seomin] was told (lied to) the day after the show was taped in Minneapolis that the wedding took place and all was well. The WWE also lied to The Today Show, The New York Times and other media outlets. Many have contacted me to express their disdain for the WWE's unprofessional marketing machine."

-Palumbo did a June 2021 interview with Metro, stating that while he wasn't gay, he had a great time playing this character and, despite the obvious controversy about his relationship with Gunn being fake, he thought the characters were still a highly positive representation about the LGBTQ community. In the interview, Palumbo had this to say. "I remember going to the ring every night, and there were kids dressed up like us! I remember one time, we had these college kids dressed up like us - grown men! It was outlandish, it was silly, but the audience, viewership saw us having fun...I think that is what made it. They saw us having fun, being two bros and having a good time, joking around. They were like "Oh my God, these guys are having a blast!" That's why the character worked." Palumbo did get some heat from other wrestlers for playing a gay character. They would say things like "Why would you do that? Tell them you don't wanna do that." Palumbo said "[But] I'm not living my gimmick. A lot of the guys unfortunately start to believe their character."

11. A doll based on an act of Al Snow was accused of promoting violence towards women

-November 1999 seen Wal-Marts across the nation pulling a doll depicting a wrestler carrying the head of a female mannequin from its shelves for accusations of promoting violence against women. The doll's forehead had "help me" written on it. Two college professors complained to Wal-Mart about it. The doll was based on wrestler Al Snow, whose gimmick was carrying a female mannequin's head into the ring prior to his matches. The VP of WWF's marketing department, Jim Byrne, claimed no complaints had been received about the toy and the act Al Snow did with the mannequin "is as silly as it gets."

12. WWE aired a tribute to wrestler Chris Benoit prior to the details of his death coming out

-On June 25, 2007, the bodies of WWE wrestler Chris Benoit, his wife and son, were found in their Atlanta home. The cause of death for the 40 year old wrestler appeared to be suicide by hanging. He was a two time world champion with a match coming up on the night of his death. The episode of Monday Night Raw that was scheduled to air that night was supposed to be part of a gimmick from a previous stunt. It was supposed to be Vince McMahon's "memorial", as he had faked his death from a limo explosion. But it was cancelled and in its place, a more reverent memorial to Benoit took place. The WWE released a statement that read as follows: "World Wrestling Entertainment is deeply saddened to report that today Chris Benoit and his family were found dead in their home. There are no further details at this time, other than the Benoit family residence is currently being investigated by authorities."

-Unfortunately, while this memorial was sweet and respectful, it turned out to be something darker than suicide by hanging. Police revealed, in their investigation, that Benoit had murdered his seven year old son and wife in the days prior to his suicide by hanging. This information was given to the WWE just hours before the memorial aired. Wrestlers who had had been truly sad about his death now suddenly tried to gain as much distance away from him as possible, the WWE doing the same. Vince McMahon appeared on TV on June 26 to announce that Benoit's name would no longer be mentioned in connection with ECW (Extreme Championship Wrestling) events or TV shows.

15 Cool German Shepherd Facts

I love German Shepherds. They are one of my favorite breeds of big dog. But then again, I love the big dog breeds, like Great Pyrenees, German Shepherd, Irish Setter, Irish/Russian Wolfhound, etc. But with German Shepherds, there are always interesting things to learn about on them.

People already know a German Shepherd when they see them. Their easily recognizable black and brown fur or all black fur or even all white fur, the fact that they are almost always going to be police dogs with little bulletproof vests on, but there is so much more to these adorable furry angels than meets the eye

1. They go by many names around the world

-The official name is German Shepherd. In Germany, however, they are referred to as "Deutscher Shaferhund". In England/Ireland, they are referred to as Alsatian. In 1917, the American Kennel Club removed the "German" from its name but put it back in 1930

2. The first dog to help the visually impaired was a German Shepherd

-Today, dogs of all breeds are trained to help people with disabilities and health conditions. The so-called "Seeing Eye" was the first group to train dogs for visually impaired people. This company started in 1929 and determined that German Shepherds were more properly suited for police work while Labradors and Retrievers became more associated with "seeing eye" dogs.

3. There is a sport invented just for German Shepherds

-Very rare when a dog breed can claim a sport. Schutzhund, a game invented in Germany, tests the dog's abilities, such as desire to work, intelligence, courage, bond with their handler, general trainability and so much more. Today this sport has a lot of breeds in it, but a lot of people still favor German Shepherds

4. They are the second most popular dog in the US

-Out of the millions of dog lovers in the US, this is the second most popular choice of dog for a lot of people. Because of the vast number of things the German Shepherd can do, that's what makes it a popular breed, especially for families because of it's highly protective nature.

5. German Shepherds are the third smartest dog breed

-Despite being second in popularity, the German Shepherd ranks third in intelligence. These animals are highly intelligent and are said to learn tricks in as little as 5 times.

6. German Shepherds have fought in wars

-These dogs are often the most sought out breed of dog for bomb sniffing, search and rescue and some have even been trained to parachute from airplanes. When the dogs go to war with their handlers, they are given just as much protection as their human handlers, which includes bulletproof vests, special shoes to protect their delicate feet, goggles or glasses to protect their eyes and more

7. Filax of Lewanno was and is a war hero!

-In WWI, a German Shepherd named Filax was recognized for his efforts. The 1917 Westminster Dog Show honored him and made mention of the fact he rescued 54 soldiers.

8. Out of all the "Best In Show" winners at the Westminster Dog Show, only one German Shepherd won

-Despite the fact that this is a popular breed of dog and they are so beautiful, only one took home the title of "Best In Show" at the Westminster Dog Show. It was 1987 and the winner was named Covy Tucker Hills Manhattan. He was the only dog from the German Shepherd herding group to win

9. These dogs are labelled as a large dog breed group

-In terms of contests, they are labelled as large dogs. But German Shepherds can vary so much in things like size, coat, weight, behavior that it makes it difficult to determine what class they fit in

10. There are eleven colors to this adorable breed

-Despite the fact that black and tan are the most recognized colors, there are eleven specific colors to this group. They include: black, white, liver, sable, black and cream, black and red, black and silver, bi-color, gray and blue.

11. Bringing a white German Shepherd to a dog show means disqualification

-Among the strict dog show judges, white German Shepherds and other unusually colored and coated breeds will, in their eyes, have flaws in them

12. There are many breeds of dog that can considered descendants of German Shepherds

-Some dogs have been bred with German Shepherds for specific purposes. One known breed is the Eastern-European Shepherd, which was created for the USSR for military tasks in the near subzero temperatures. There are 4 other breeds like this, but are not well known. Some are even part wolf

13. Orthopedic conditions are one of the most common health ailments in German Shepherds

-Because of their large size, back and hip issues are incredibly common among German Shepherds. That should definitely be considered when considering adoption of a German Shepherd. These issues can be avoided or even reduced by a diet healthy in vitamins and minerals.

14. This dog breed is worldwide popular

-Not shockingly, this dog breed is still incredibly popular in Germany. Every year, 15,000 German Shepherd puppies are born there, while this adds to the already 250,000 purebred dogs living there already

15. There is a special club just for senior German Shepherds

-The German Shepherd Club of America founded a club called "The Thirteen Club", made specifically for older German Shepherds 12 years of age and up

September Birthdays

Since it's September, time to say Happy Birthday!

Joe Perry

-Birth name: Joseph Anthony Pereira

-DOB: 9/10/1950

-Where: Lawrence, Massachusetts

-He left Aerosmith in 1979 after a backstage incident involving his first wife Elyssa pouring milk on Terry Hamilton, the wife of bassist Brad Hamilton

Jeremy Irons

-Birth name: Jeremy John Irons

-DOB: 9/19/1948

-Where: Isle of Wight, England

-He always wears a signet ring with the initials PDI on it. These stand for Paul Dugan Irons, his father

Freddie Mercury

-Birth name: Farokh Bomi Bulsara

-DOB: 9/5/1946

-Where: Stone Town, Zanzibar, Tanzania

-DOD: 11/24/1991

-Where: London, England (AIDS-related complications)

-He was bullied for his overbite, but it actually worked to his advantage. He had four extra teeth pushing his incisor teeth out. He often said he regretted not being able to get them fixed, but he feared it would damage his singing voice

Harriet Walter

-Birth name: Harriet Mary Walter

-DOB: 09/24/1950

-Where: London, England

-Both she and her uncle, Sir Christopher Lee, appeared in Star Wars films. He played Count Dooku in Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones, Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith and Star Wars: The Clone Wars. She played Dr. Kalania in Star Wars Episode VII - The Force Awakens

Colin Firth

-Birth name: Colin Andrew Firth

-DOB: 9/10/1960

-Where: Grayshott, Hampshire, England

-His brother, Jonathan, an actor himself, told Colin "Darcy? But isn't he supposed to be sexy?" when he found out his brother Colin would be playing a character named Darcy in Pride & Prejudice

Scott Travis

-DOB: 9/6/1961

-Where: Norfolk, Virginia

-Despite gaining notoriety and fame working with Judas Priest, Fight, Racer X, Scott worked in the drum department at Mars Music in Virginia Beach, Virginia

Elderly Couple Sued for Playing Iron Maiden Too Loudly

You might think you're seeing things, but no, sadly, you're not. An elderly couple was sued for playing Iron Maiden too loudly.

An elderly Swedish couple living in a quiet little retirement community in Stockholm has gotten a little trouble going for themselves. Their crime? Playing Iron Maiden too loudly.

According to a paper called Aftonbladet, the couple were getting payback on a couple who had just moved into the neighborhood and the elderly couple did this by blasting the music of the veteran English metal band. Neighbors around the Swedish Maiden fans say the issues started in October when the new neighbors arrived and their sex life was more than just loud and boisterous. The couple would have all night matches of love making.

The couple, 81 and 71 years old, who remain unnamed, weren't going to have it. They made noise too, but noise of the more metal variety. They tossed some Maiden into a stereo and cranked the volume as high as it would let them. It got to the point where the police had to forcibly enter the couple's home while the song "Afraid to Shoot Strangers", an epic written by Steve Harris about the Gulf War, was playing. The only charge the couple was facing was harassment. 

19 Videos Banned by MTV

MTV, when it first aired, was desperate for videos to play. Little did they know they would have to censor a good majority of them. Due to excessive nudity, extreme violence, showing use of drugs or whatever else, some videos were banned. Today this might not seem like a big deal, showing naked bodies, groping, violence, etc., but back then it was a big deal, especially with that group of annoying busybodies known as the PMRC (Parents Music Resource Council) threatening to stick black and white "Parental Advisory" stickers on everything. Here are 19 videos banned by MTV

Queen - Body Language (1982)

-In the early years of MTV, the channel was hesitant to show near nakedness or full nudity. Queen decided that they were going to put as much of that as possible in the video for their 1982 song "Body Language". This band has always been about doing everything that was unconventional. Because it showed males and females running around nearly naked in a locker room, it became the first clip banned by MTV. Today it wouldn't even be shocking, but back then it was certainly scandal-worthy

Van Halen - Oh, Pretty Woman (1982)

-The legendary California rockers covered the Roy Orbison classic to much success. The video, however, raised more than a few eyebrows. This song is not an overly sexual, overly violent or even graphic song. It's a simple tune that sounds so refreshingly innocent. The video, however, is anything but. The band members - Alex dressed as Tarzan, Michael dressed as a Samurai, Eddie as a cowboy and David as Napoleon - are on a mission to save a damsel in distress who is being held hostage by two dwarves. Towards the end, the "woman" is actually a drag queen. This, coupled with the two dwarves fondling the woman, were seen as highly controversial. Most viewers never got a chance to see it because it got the ban early on

Motorhead - Killed by Death (1983)

-Motorhead never really has been one to follow the conventional rules of music. They walk to the beat of their own loud volume drums. The video for their 1983 song "Killed by Death" might seem cheesy, but it's also charming, at least by today's standards it's that. In 1983, it definitely raised the ire of people at MTV. The video shows Lemmy flipping the one finger salute to the camera, getting shot at by riot police, executed in the electric chair and then rising from the deathly grave while astride a motorcycle. It was way too much of an assault on the senses of the people at MTV. It was banned due to "excessive and senseless violence." Yet, Motorhead fans weren't complaining then and yet they're still not complaining now

Queen - I Want to Break Free (1984)

-This one definitely caused controversy. Two years prior, they were one of the first bands to have a video banned from MTV. It was 1982's "Body Language". Here they are, two years later, for the same thing - banned video. This time it's for "I Want to Break Free". The rockers decided to do their take on a classic English program called Coronation Street. The band members dressed in drag as characters from that program. Guitarist Brian May recalled in a later interview "We dressed up as the characters in that soap. And there were female characters, so we were dressing up as girls, as women...we had a fantastic laugh doing it. " MTV was not even remotely interested in showing a video where cross-dressing was happening. In the same interview, May recalls "And they would say 'No, we can't play this. We can't possible play this.'"

Twisted Sister - Be Chrool to Your Scuel (1985)

-This band right here is and was one of the primary bands to have banned videos. This video is certainly no different. A whirlwind of famous musicians appeared on the song, including E-Street saxophonist Clarence Clemmons, Alice Cooper, Billy Joel and Brian Setzer. The video, however, featured future Beverly Hills, 90210 star Luke Perry and comedian Bobcat Goldthwaite. None of this was ensuring the video would get played. The video's plot was Goldthwaite playing a teacher unable to connect to his students. Angered, he goes to the teacher's lounge to unwind with some Twisted Sister. The students turn into zombies, with Goldthwaite and another teacher, turning into Dee Snider and Alice Cooper, who do the best they can to evade the army of the undead. Snider later wrote in his memoir Shut up and Give Me the Mic "They told us that the zombie content was 'too gross' for MTV and absolutely no amount of editing would fix it. It was no worse than Michael Jackson's 14-minute, MTV-Award-winning zombie opus for "Thriller", but our was un-airable?" Snider firmly believes that those who made up the Parents Music Resource Council made Twisted Sister an example of the supposed "bad influence" they had on youngsters. "Like the fans, MTV discovered they could throw concerned parents a bone with Twisted Sister that would have little effect on their viewership. Scumbags."

Motley Crue - Girls, Girls, Girls (1987)

-The #1 song most requested for strippers was filmed at the #1 favorite strip club haunted by members of Motley Crue, The Seventh Veil Strip Club in Los Angeles. The original version of the video showed dancers in the nude. It was, surprise surprise, banned by MTV. The band redid the video with the dancers wearing bikinis and bras, making it less risque. The changed version quickly became one of the most heavily played videos on MTV

Motley Crue - You're All I Need (1987)

-Once again, the LA metallers are back with another video to be banned. This video had nothing to do with sexual content. It was, instead, banned for overly violent content. The video's plot was about an abusive relationship that eventually ends in murder. This is the unfortunate side effect of a lot of actual abusive relationships. MTV found it too sensitive to air. At the time, Crue bassist Nikki Sixx explained "You're All I Need" doesn't condone or exploit this tragedy. It clearly shows how one life is destroyed and another ruined forever. And it's probably a lot less graphic than much of what we see on the 6 o'clock news every night."

Megadeth - In My Darkest Hour (1987)

-MTV thought this song promoted suicide with lyrics like "Things will be better when I'm dead and gone / But I got to die first / Please, God, send me on my way". This is an example of when lyrical content gets a video banned. It doesn't happen all the time, which is why viewers scratched their heads at why this video didn't get airplay. Megadeth bassist/founding member Dave Mustaine argues that the song is not about suicide, but instead about the death of Metallica bassist Cliff Burton

Neil Young - This Note's For You

-This list clearly shows just how much they wanted to avoid trouble. Neil Young is certainly known for being political, but how one of his songs got banned by MTV is anyone's guess. Of course, with this song, MTV's primary asset and source of income were advertisers. When you have a song putting down said advertisers, then things get a little tense. The logic is simple; anger a fan and off goes the TV. Anger a company putting ads on your station and they pull the money train out of your station. In 1988, when Neil Young decided to berate advertisers in "This Note's For You", MTV played the part of Switzerland and wanted nothing to do with it; they stayed out. In an open letter to the network, Young had this to say. "What does the M in MTV stand for - music or money?". He called MTV "spineless jerks". However at the 1989 VMAs, "This Note's For You" won Video of the Year, despite being banned by the exact same network that banned it initially

Billy Idol - Cradle of Love (1990)

-The video released in May 1990, less than a year after controversial comedian Andrew Dice Clay made headlines for performing a hugely misogynistic stand up act at the 1989 VMAs. The original video for this featured clips from Clay's film The Adventures of Ford Fairlaine. When Clay was COMPLETELY edited out of the original video, then this new version could air. The song and video would go to the #1 spot on the mainstream charts

Sepultura - Arise (1991)

-The video for "Arise", taken from the band's fourth album, didn't get airplay. Otherwise, it wouldn't be listed here. This helped establish the Brazilian band as one of metal's newest legends. Certainly the video didn't do them or MTV any favors. It showed bloodied gas-masked bodies, nailed to crosses like Jesus, showing marks through the hands and feet in what is called in the world of Christianity as stigmata, was more than enough reason for MTV to say NO to the video

Soundgarden - Jesus Christ Pose (1991)

-The name alone probably got it banned. One thing to definitely not do is mock religion. That raises the temper of a lot of people. Surprise surprise - this video got banned for graphic religious imagery. The band knew what kind of havoc was going to come, so prior to the video's release, they issued a press statement. "'Jesus Christ Pose', despite the song's title, has no religious meaning. It doesn't have anything to do with religion or my view on it. It just has to do with people exploiting a symbol. I think it's silly for other people to exploit it on the basis that it is sacred. Sometimes groups just beg for ideas like that or certain titles, and they just end up with them - which will probably never be understood because people will just see the title of the song and make a monster out of it."

Nine Inch Nails - Happiness in Slavery (1992)

-In the years before this band went mainstream, this band fought MTV, no pun intended, tooth and nail over the video for "Happiness in Slavery". The video shows an individual, played by performance artist Bob Flanagan, strapped to a machine that drills, tears and grinds his body to nothing until he dies. The man seems to respond with a mixture of pain and pleasure, showing the most extreme form of sadomasochism. The video would be included with their 1997 video album Closure

Tool - Prison Sex (1993)

-Unlike all the videos here, this video got some airplay before eventually being banned. Adam Jones, one of the guitarists, directed the stop-motion animation video. The plot of the video shows a small, human-like doll tormented by a larger, demon-like entity. The symbolism, in some people's minds, links to child abuse. It was deemed too sensitive and controversial for MTV. In an article for the San Francisco Chronicle, front man Maynard James Keenan had this to say. "What got me about the whole situation was, here you have these other videos where Steven Tyler's daughter is stripping in front of old men, or where Janet Jackson is practically having oral sex. I find that kind of disturbing, yet it's something that's just thrown in people's laps and they don't think twice about it. So I guess anything that deals with that sort of subject matter is going to end up hitting road blocks."

Nine Inch Nails - Closer (1994)

-Once again, Nine Inch Nails had to edit a video to get airplay. This video is practically a list of the Do's and Do Not's of videos. The video shows nudity, bondage, religious imagery (a monkey strapped to a crucifix), profanity, which made it public enemy #1 with MTV. In the places where the offensive content was, a title card reading "scene missing" was inserted. Years later, in an Entertainment Weekly interview, video director Mark Romanek had this to say. "It was a pretty ballsy and extravagant thing for Trent [Reznor] to do. But MTV liked it, so it started a long negotiation of how we can get it on the air. I want to go on record about the monkey: that monkey was not in any danger, even though he appears in distress. The monkey was just munching on bits of banana and enjoying himself. We had an ASPCA person on the set. It wasn't harmed and actually got paid more some of the crew."

Megadeth - A Tout Le Monde (1994)

-Same issue as with "In My Darkest Hour". This song was said to, by MTV's opinion, glamorize suicide. Some of the lyrics include "These are the last words I'll ever speak / And they'll set me free" while the video shows Dave Mustaine digging a grave. What makes this even more controversial is that the album this track is from is called Youthanasia, a slight mocking of the word euthanasia

Megadeth - Reckoning Day (1994)

-Megadeth just can't seem to get away from video bans. This video was banned for no apparent reason. There were no questionable lyrics, but it was discovered that MTV and the band's label, along with two previous video bans, which led to this video getting banned

Smashing Pumpkins - Try, Try, Try (2000)

-When The Smashing Pumpkins wrote this single in 2000, they hired a Swedish video director named Jonas Akerlund. He created a visually moving video, but one that was also hard to watch. The extended version of the video ran for 15 minutes and followed the lives of a couple of heroin addicts. They live on the streets, begging, committing crimes and even prostituting themselves to pay for their addiction. Things reach a head when the woman gets pregnant, overdoses and miscarries. The video shows realistic drug use and was too intense for MTV viewers

Foo Fighters - Low (2003)

-This is one band you would never expect to have a video ban on. Their songs have never seemed inappropriate. Unfortunately, this video was banned for explicit and graphic content. The video shows Dave Grohl and Jack Black appearing as hillbilly versions of themselves meeting up a little dive motel for fun. They start out chugging whiskey and arm wrestling, but then later shift to putting on women's lingerie and running around. Foo Fighters guitarist Chris Shiflett explains to NME "It's Dave and Jack being incredibly sketchy. It's white-trash porn. Dave's a big man to let the world see him in that way. It's a side of Dave Grohl you've never seen before!"

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Creatively

We've all wanted to get revenge on someone who may have wronged us. In this case, it's the service industry. You are basically the servant of the public, whether it be behind the front desk at a hotel, food service, etc. Here are a few examples of how people got a little sweet payback.

1.) A customer at a liquor store and wants to pay with a big denomination bill, despite having the right amount. She certainly got her exact change-ZeroPenguinParty

-Just happened. Its towards the end of the business day for my bottle shop. I'm running low on certain items of change in the register, so I am asking for people to pay with exact amounts, or by card. Enter Karen. Karen comes in, and purchases a $7 bottle of wine. If she was to pay with a $10 note, that's ok. But she decided she wanted to pay with a $50 note. I asked her if she had anything smaller, and she claimed she didn't...yet I could see the edge of a $10 note in her purse. I could have given her 2 $20 notes, or a $20 and a $10 and 2 $5 notes as part of her change, but I decided not to. I decided to get some petty revenge on her. For while I may have been VERY short on notes...I had plenty of coins...especially $1 coins, as a customer had paid a $20 sale with $1 coins just 30 minutes ago. So I told Karen that I would have to give a few coins in her change...then proceeded to count out $43 in $1 coins. Her face was getting redder and redder, until eventually, at about the $25 mark, she said "Wait, I might have a $10 note", and then proceeded to get the $10 note out to pay with.

2.) 2 year decaf binge-guacamollie19998

-Hey Mister Verizon Man,

You sold my dad refurbished iPhones and told him they were new. They were Hanukkah presents for my brothers and I. My dad was so mad that you sold him used phones— you lied to him. And he returned them. He returned them and he swore off iPhones, and I didn’t get a smartphone until I was eighteen. Mister Verizon Man, I was (nearly) the only one in my class who didn’t have an iPhone because of you. And you made my dad very angry on our favorite holiday. Mister Verizon Man, you didn’t know me, but I knew you. And when you walked into Dunkin Donuts, you ordered an extra-large hot coffee from me. Black. Mister Verizon Man, you ordered that coffee from me every morning I worked for two years. And every morning, after you ordered, I or my friends behind the counter would pour you decaf coffee. Every morning for two years, you thought you were sipping that sweet, caffeinated Dunkin coffee. But you were enjoying some lowly decaf. I hope my subtle revenge has made you a sleepy guy behind the counter lying to customers, selling refurbished phones in place of new. Maybe you pocket the difference in money, I don’t know. But anyways, Mister Verizon Man, screw you.

3.) Steps to looking like a jackass in a card store. 1. enter a store screaming. 2. pick up wrong card intended for lesbian couple. 3. give to happy couple-Marx0r

-Here I am, working a Saturday evening shift at a card and gift store. (Think Hallmark, but not that brand name.) As anyone that's worked one can tell you, a good 50% of the customers are clearly enroute to the event they're buying the card for, and a good 50% of those people think that their lack of planning is your problem. So I'm in the middle of assisting a customer when I see a Very Expensive Car pull up and park in the fire lane outside the store. A man in a Very Expensive Suit gets out of the car and walks in. Upon entering, he heads to the back without breaking stride and shouts "WEDDING CARDS?" I don't think he even saw me, he just figured that since he's the most important person in the world, there must be someone at his beck and call. I'm mid-sentence with my customer, so I finish it before addressing him. Before I can, he actually used a little effort to find the clearly-labelled cards himself, which he politely informed me of with a "GOT IT!" About 4 seconds later, he arrives at the counter, having obviously picked out the first card he saw. Maintaining volume, he respectfully requests to borrow a pen to fill out the card while he's in the process of reaching over the counter to grab one from my pen cup. While he's filling it out, as I ring up my next customer around the space he's taking up on my counter, I look down and notice that he's adressed the card to at least one male name. I also notice that he's picked out the one wedding card we sell that is unambiguously for a lesbian couple. I saw no reason to trouble him with that information.

4.) Drinks are worth the price-dearghewls

-I'm a bartender and the area I work in is upper class and petty as hell. As I tell people all the time “I don’t go out here, I just work here.” One random night not too long ago I’m making drinks at the well for servers to take to their customers at their tables while the other bartenders handle our bar top guests. It’s the middle of our rush and one of my servers comes up with a drink 1/4 full and sets it down saying the customer hates it and was demanding a different drink. Specifically, they wanted a vodka mojito. I was too busy to put up a fight and the poor girl looked run down already from the night, so I went ahead and made it, even though it was obvious the woman was just looking for free shit.

The server runs the drink to the table and it happens to be the table closest to my well so I can see and hear everything. She sets it down and hurries off to another table waving her down and I watch as this woman SLAMS the drink until there is nothing but mint and ice left in the glass, with maaaybe half an ounce of liquid in the bottom, then turns around and grabs the server again. “Uhm, I specifically asked for this with VODKA.” “Yes, ma’am, it is.” “I know what vodka tastes like, this is clearly rum. Tell your bartender to make it right this time, I’m not paying for this.” The server tried to say something but was rudely cut off and told to get it remade again, so she picks up the glass and walks over to me.

“I’m so sorry OP,” she starts, and I immediately tell her it’s okay, I saw the whole thing. “Girl, don’t worry. I got you.” So I remade the woman’s drink. One virgin mojito coming up. Nuthin but mint, lime, simple, and soda water. I cannot explain the satisfaction we both felt when that drink hit the table and we watched the woman sip it and go “Now THAT is vodka.” You get what you pay for.

5.) Penny for your thoughts?-throwaway105597

-So I used to work at a now closed-down retail shop in the UK that sold cd’s, DVD’s, vinyl, that sort of thing. We had a lot of regular customers that used to irk us, but in particular was this one guy who used to come in, buy roughly £20-£40 worth of things, and then pay for his entire transaction in coins, mainly pennies, 5ps, 10ps and 20ps. Not even pounds. Each time we’d have to stand there and count each coin individually (otherwise the tills would be wrong at the end of the day), holding up the queue, while he stood there with a smug look on his face making jokes about how long it took us to process the transaction.

Now, I’m not the greatest at maths (I have dyscalculia) so numbers aren’t my strong point. I used to hide when this guy came in so I wouldn’t have to serve him because I knew I’d take longer than everyone else to count up his money and put it in the till and then I’d hold up the queue. This time, there was no one else on shop floor, and the penny guy comes in. So I had to serve him. To my surprise, this time he actually gave me some notes to pay with, and secretly I was thrilled, because it meant I could now take revenge. I processed the transaction and with a smug look on my face, start counting out £12 worth of change in pennies, 5ps, 10ps and 20ps.

He questions what I’m doing and I say, sorry sir, we have too many coins in the till and we’ve been told to get rid of them (a lie obviously). He stands there for a good 10 mins while I count out his change, lose count, have to start over again all the while smiling and putting on my best fake sweet customer service voice. The entire time he’s standing there getting red faced and impatient, tapping on the counter, sighing loudly under his breath until I finished and gave him all of his change. He remained a regular customer, but never paid in pennies ever again!

6.) Closing at 10 means exactly that!-arsenicandoldspice

-Last night I was at work at my Family Owned Beverage Shop. It's not my favorite job I've ever had because the customers are incredibly entitled. The end of the night was approaching, beautiful, sacred closing time. We had gotten a decent rush about 20 minutes before we closed (at 10pm) so we were a little cranky about how behind we were on finishing our tasks for the night. At 9:55, we're finally getting somewhere with our cleaning when the phone rings. Sounds like a youngish boy, I'd say 15y/o at most. He asked what time we closed, and I responded with my usual, "We close at 10 every night, but we'll be open at 11 again tomorrow morning!" That's not working for him. "My friends and I really want some of your drinks but we can't be there by 10, can we come like five minutes after and still get drinks?" I tell him no, the doors get locked promptly at 10. "Oh, well we really want the drinks, what can you do?" I say "You can be here by 10, because I personally will be locking the doors." We hang up. I know he's going to try to come in anyway.

Sure enough, at 10:06, my coworkers and I hear a bunch of banging and rattling on the closed doors. Yep, like three or four high school aged kids. Sorry, we're closed. The chairs are up, the menu is turned off, someone is mopping, THE DOORS ARE LOCKED. Any time they catch one of our eyes (which we all do our best to avoid) they give us what they think are puppy dog eyes, and we laugh and shake our heads at them. No dice. They keep assaulting the doors. It's getting annoying, so I look up at them brightly with a big smile and start walking toward the doors. They start getting excited, thinking they've finally worn us down. I hold eye contact until I swerve to the right to turn off all the lights. I could hear their collective "awwwww!!!" of disappointment through the door. It felt amazing. They left. I laughed. I won. 

7.) What language do you prefer?-AlfafaFloozy

-I'm an American that was born and raised in the south. It's an obvious dialect. Also, English is a 2nd language for most people here. Language barriers are not uncommon. All of this comes into the revenge. Years ago, I worked in a call center. It was a large company with English and Spanish departments. I worked in the English department, but sat next to our Spanish department. I handled billing. No one calls billing in a good mood, but in general they're angry with the company not the rep. You calm them down, fix the issue, and you're off to the next call. Few customers are memorable, but this one I will never forget and I still laugh. This call happened on a busy day with long wait times. This just made the revenge sweeter.The call went like this.

Me: Thank you for calling blah blah blah.

Lady: I want an American on the phone.

Me: What?

Lady: I said I want an AMERICAN on the phone.

Me: Mam, I'm an American.

Lady: I WANT AN AMERICAN ON THE PHONE!

At this point, I can only assume I'm not speaking the right language.

Me: Un momento por favor

I put her on hold, transfer her over to the Spanish line, and just giggled to myself.

BUT IT DIDN'T END THERE. The lines were starting to calm down and I was chatting with one of the Spanish reps when his desk mate pops up and says she's got a psycho on the phone. IT WAS THE WOMAN I HAD TRANSFERRED!!! She was going BALLISTIC! The Spanish rep had her on mute while talking to us. I apologized and told her what happened. She started laughing. Then looks right at me and said "I'm gonna put her back in the Spanish queue". The Spanish department had a blast laughing at this crazy b*tch as they kept putting her back in the queue. I don't know if she ever got her issue fixed. Then again, we never found out what the issue was either. She was too busy yelling at everyone. Moral of the story, be nice to phone reps.

8.) Shoplifting don't pay-Erik069

-When I was in high school I worked as a stocker in a grocery store. One hot Saturday I’m stocking the ice cream freezer and saw a young women grab a couple ice-cream bars and shove them in her shorts. Quickly I found my manger and told him what I’d seen. I pointed out the women as she was walking out of the store, he went running. Caught up with her. I watched from the store entry as he chatted with her for a few minutes in the hot parking lot. I wondering what the heck they where talking about. As the manager is walking back to the store I see her reach in her shorts and toss the bars into the landscape planter. His revenge was to tell her the store was doing a survey and had some customer survey questions for her. Probably being scared she cooperated. When he saw melting ice cream running down her legs he finished the interview. Thanked her and came back into the store. We had a good laugh over his creative way to punish this shoplifter.

9.) Troublesome customer has to get her refund...50 miles away-Joelovesbacon97

-Before I start, for some background, I work at customer service as a department lead and I'll say my hardware store practices the rule that says "we reserve the right to refuse and limit any returns for any reasons" very often. With that being said... A Karen slithered into my store with a water heater that was around $800, She hissed at us "I want to return it" I asked if she had a receipt, she ask why does she need one and I said to do the refund, since it was over $50, we would for sure need a proof of purchase, she groaned and dug around in her purse and called me a moron and etc, she was already rude for no apparent reason.

I was kind of already in a pissy mood that day so I decided I'd have some fun with her being an a**hole by being an a**hole back to her. When she presented the receipt, I looked at the receipt to find any possible reason to deny her return and saw it! It was bought at a store 50+ miles away, with items that expensive we normally ask the customer to return to point of sale. So I told her "you can't return this item at this store, you need to return this item at the point of sale, which is the riverside store" when she heard this she hissed at me in anger something to the effect of "NO I WANT TO RETURN IT HERE I AM NOT DRIVING THAT FAR FOR A REFUND!” She proceeded to yell at me and my associates further, calling us rather offensive names and whatnot, until she asked for a Manager, so I got one, but I made sure to call my manager who has the same mindset of denying returns just like me. When my boss came, he saw what was going on, and he was on my side, he told her the same thing I said and she cursed us all out and slithered off to hell. As soon as she went off to the parking lot, we all began to laugh :)

10.) My two cents on this-/jzimm79

-I work retail and part of that is ringing customers up for their purchases. Occasionally you’ll get a total of 9.02 and the customer will pay with a ten. Normally I’ll give them a dollar instead of counting out .98. Today I gave a customer the dollar instead of a handful of change and he asked for another dollar because one corner was slightly torn. Instead of giving him a new dollar I gave him a handful of change. Oh the look on his entitled face. That tiny bit of revenge will get me thru this day.

11.) Waiting is the hardest part...for hard work-lupin_stargazer

-I work a crappy retail job, and we just started putting out our christmas stock (It kills me to say that when it isn't even Halloween yet). I was working the register while my coworker was in the back room handling a delivery. It was a quiet night, no customers for about half an hour, and in walks a woman with her three year old daughter. They start looking in the christmas aisle. I happen to walk by it about ten minutes later, and the aisle is completely trashed. I watch as her daughter pulls three pegs worth of garland off the wall, then as her mother picks out the color she wants and leaves the rest on the floor. This woman had allowed her daughter to do this for nearly everything in the aisle.

She saw me, took her daughters hand and said "Come on honey, lets go check out while this nice lady cleans up." And she leads her kid toward the check out. Well, jokes on you, lady. I'm the only one working them tonight! I start cleaning the aisle (very slowly) while she waits at the register. After a few minutes, the lady looks at me and clears her throat. I look up, smile and say "I'm sorry, but company policy states that I can't leave any obstruction in an aisle unattended. I'll be with you as soon as I can." And I go back to cleaning. Made her wait for a good twenty minutes trying to entertain a bored, increasingly whiny toddler before I came up and wrang her stuff up. I made sure to give her my biggest smile as I handed her her change and said "Have a nice night!".

12.) The change-man strikes no more-PM_YOUR_PRETTY_FACE

-I work overnights in a gas station in a particularly bad part of town. So from 11pm-6am I use a pass through drawer to make transactions so I don't get shot or robbed. This one a**hole shows up a couple times a week and gets at least 20 dollars in gas, and maybe 10-15 bucks in other stuff. How does he pay? By just dumping a handful of change into the drawer, making me pick it all up. Even if I have my hand out, he'll go under my hand and throw it in the drawer. That pissed me off like you wouldn't believe, so I started being rude back to him. I don't give him his stuff until I pick up each coin piece by piece and then count it all out and put it in the drawer. I'm talking like $30 in quarters and dimes and nickels so it takes a good five minutes. One time I was doing it, he says "Come the f**k on man, I'm in a hurry!" I just said "Yeah?" and kept going while he huffed and puffed and swore and paced back and forth. After 5 or 6 times of this, he started paying only in bills. I win :)

13.) Today was your last "free meal comp" from us-blobley

-I'll start off by saying that I take pride in cooking customers orders to perfection, and I strive to always make the customer happy. It's hard to do that when the person calls back every time no matter what and says that we messed their order up in some way. Well today sir, today was your last meal from us. I deleted your account and blocked all of your numbers that you have ever called us from. When you call, you will get a never ending elevator music tone. I also took the liberty of emailing every pizza place in a 3 mile radius of our store to inform them of your selfish habit. I told them what you do, and how many times you have done it to us. Hope you like Chinese food from now on f***er.