Life is what happens when you are making other plans~ John Lennon
An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind~Gandhi
The time is always right to do what is right~ Martin Luther King Jr.


Sunday, September 12, 2021

Revenge is a Dish Best Served Creatively

We've all wanted to get revenge on someone who may have wronged us. In this case, it's the service industry. You are basically the servant of the public, whether it be behind the front desk at a hotel, food service, etc. Here are a few examples of how people got a little sweet payback.

1.) A customer at a liquor store and wants to pay with a big denomination bill, despite having the right amount. She certainly got her exact change-ZeroPenguinParty

-Just happened. Its towards the end of the business day for my bottle shop. I'm running low on certain items of change in the register, so I am asking for people to pay with exact amounts, or by card. Enter Karen. Karen comes in, and purchases a $7 bottle of wine. If she was to pay with a $10 note, that's ok. But she decided she wanted to pay with a $50 note. I asked her if she had anything smaller, and she claimed she didn't...yet I could see the edge of a $10 note in her purse. I could have given her 2 $20 notes, or a $20 and a $10 and 2 $5 notes as part of her change, but I decided not to. I decided to get some petty revenge on her. For while I may have been VERY short on notes...I had plenty of coins...especially $1 coins, as a customer had paid a $20 sale with $1 coins just 30 minutes ago. So I told Karen that I would have to give a few coins in her change...then proceeded to count out $43 in $1 coins. Her face was getting redder and redder, until eventually, at about the $25 mark, she said "Wait, I might have a $10 note", and then proceeded to get the $10 note out to pay with.

2.) 2 year decaf binge-guacamollie19998

-Hey Mister Verizon Man,

You sold my dad refurbished iPhones and told him they were new. They were Hanukkah presents for my brothers and I. My dad was so mad that you sold him used phones— you lied to him. And he returned them. He returned them and he swore off iPhones, and I didn’t get a smartphone until I was eighteen. Mister Verizon Man, I was (nearly) the only one in my class who didn’t have an iPhone because of you. And you made my dad very angry on our favorite holiday. Mister Verizon Man, you didn’t know me, but I knew you. And when you walked into Dunkin Donuts, you ordered an extra-large hot coffee from me. Black. Mister Verizon Man, you ordered that coffee from me every morning I worked for two years. And every morning, after you ordered, I or my friends behind the counter would pour you decaf coffee. Every morning for two years, you thought you were sipping that sweet, caffeinated Dunkin coffee. But you were enjoying some lowly decaf. I hope my subtle revenge has made you a sleepy guy behind the counter lying to customers, selling refurbished phones in place of new. Maybe you pocket the difference in money, I don’t know. But anyways, Mister Verizon Man, screw you.

3.) Steps to looking like a jackass in a card store. 1. enter a store screaming. 2. pick up wrong card intended for lesbian couple. 3. give to happy couple-Marx0r

-Here I am, working a Saturday evening shift at a card and gift store. (Think Hallmark, but not that brand name.) As anyone that's worked one can tell you, a good 50% of the customers are clearly enroute to the event they're buying the card for, and a good 50% of those people think that their lack of planning is your problem. So I'm in the middle of assisting a customer when I see a Very Expensive Car pull up and park in the fire lane outside the store. A man in a Very Expensive Suit gets out of the car and walks in. Upon entering, he heads to the back without breaking stride and shouts "WEDDING CARDS?" I don't think he even saw me, he just figured that since he's the most important person in the world, there must be someone at his beck and call. I'm mid-sentence with my customer, so I finish it before addressing him. Before I can, he actually used a little effort to find the clearly-labelled cards himself, which he politely informed me of with a "GOT IT!" About 4 seconds later, he arrives at the counter, having obviously picked out the first card he saw. Maintaining volume, he respectfully requests to borrow a pen to fill out the card while he's in the process of reaching over the counter to grab one from my pen cup. While he's filling it out, as I ring up my next customer around the space he's taking up on my counter, I look down and notice that he's adressed the card to at least one male name. I also notice that he's picked out the one wedding card we sell that is unambiguously for a lesbian couple. I saw no reason to trouble him with that information.

4.) Drinks are worth the price-dearghewls

-I'm a bartender and the area I work in is upper class and petty as hell. As I tell people all the time “I don’t go out here, I just work here.” One random night not too long ago I’m making drinks at the well for servers to take to their customers at their tables while the other bartenders handle our bar top guests. It’s the middle of our rush and one of my servers comes up with a drink 1/4 full and sets it down saying the customer hates it and was demanding a different drink. Specifically, they wanted a vodka mojito. I was too busy to put up a fight and the poor girl looked run down already from the night, so I went ahead and made it, even though it was obvious the woman was just looking for free shit.

The server runs the drink to the table and it happens to be the table closest to my well so I can see and hear everything. She sets it down and hurries off to another table waving her down and I watch as this woman SLAMS the drink until there is nothing but mint and ice left in the glass, with maaaybe half an ounce of liquid in the bottom, then turns around and grabs the server again. “Uhm, I specifically asked for this with VODKA.” “Yes, ma’am, it is.” “I know what vodka tastes like, this is clearly rum. Tell your bartender to make it right this time, I’m not paying for this.” The server tried to say something but was rudely cut off and told to get it remade again, so she picks up the glass and walks over to me.

“I’m so sorry OP,” she starts, and I immediately tell her it’s okay, I saw the whole thing. “Girl, don’t worry. I got you.” So I remade the woman’s drink. One virgin mojito coming up. Nuthin but mint, lime, simple, and soda water. I cannot explain the satisfaction we both felt when that drink hit the table and we watched the woman sip it and go “Now THAT is vodka.” You get what you pay for.

5.) Penny for your thoughts?-throwaway105597

-So I used to work at a now closed-down retail shop in the UK that sold cd’s, DVD’s, vinyl, that sort of thing. We had a lot of regular customers that used to irk us, but in particular was this one guy who used to come in, buy roughly £20-£40 worth of things, and then pay for his entire transaction in coins, mainly pennies, 5ps, 10ps and 20ps. Not even pounds. Each time we’d have to stand there and count each coin individually (otherwise the tills would be wrong at the end of the day), holding up the queue, while he stood there with a smug look on his face making jokes about how long it took us to process the transaction.

Now, I’m not the greatest at maths (I have dyscalculia) so numbers aren’t my strong point. I used to hide when this guy came in so I wouldn’t have to serve him because I knew I’d take longer than everyone else to count up his money and put it in the till and then I’d hold up the queue. This time, there was no one else on shop floor, and the penny guy comes in. So I had to serve him. To my surprise, this time he actually gave me some notes to pay with, and secretly I was thrilled, because it meant I could now take revenge. I processed the transaction and with a smug look on my face, start counting out £12 worth of change in pennies, 5ps, 10ps and 20ps.

He questions what I’m doing and I say, sorry sir, we have too many coins in the till and we’ve been told to get rid of them (a lie obviously). He stands there for a good 10 mins while I count out his change, lose count, have to start over again all the while smiling and putting on my best fake sweet customer service voice. The entire time he’s standing there getting red faced and impatient, tapping on the counter, sighing loudly under his breath until I finished and gave him all of his change. He remained a regular customer, but never paid in pennies ever again!

6.) Closing at 10 means exactly that!-arsenicandoldspice

-Last night I was at work at my Family Owned Beverage Shop. It's not my favorite job I've ever had because the customers are incredibly entitled. The end of the night was approaching, beautiful, sacred closing time. We had gotten a decent rush about 20 minutes before we closed (at 10pm) so we were a little cranky about how behind we were on finishing our tasks for the night. At 9:55, we're finally getting somewhere with our cleaning when the phone rings. Sounds like a youngish boy, I'd say 15y/o at most. He asked what time we closed, and I responded with my usual, "We close at 10 every night, but we'll be open at 11 again tomorrow morning!" That's not working for him. "My friends and I really want some of your drinks but we can't be there by 10, can we come like five minutes after and still get drinks?" I tell him no, the doors get locked promptly at 10. "Oh, well we really want the drinks, what can you do?" I say "You can be here by 10, because I personally will be locking the doors." We hang up. I know he's going to try to come in anyway.

Sure enough, at 10:06, my coworkers and I hear a bunch of banging and rattling on the closed doors. Yep, like three or four high school aged kids. Sorry, we're closed. The chairs are up, the menu is turned off, someone is mopping, THE DOORS ARE LOCKED. Any time they catch one of our eyes (which we all do our best to avoid) they give us what they think are puppy dog eyes, and we laugh and shake our heads at them. No dice. They keep assaulting the doors. It's getting annoying, so I look up at them brightly with a big smile and start walking toward the doors. They start getting excited, thinking they've finally worn us down. I hold eye contact until I swerve to the right to turn off all the lights. I could hear their collective "awwwww!!!" of disappointment through the door. It felt amazing. They left. I laughed. I won. 

7.) What language do you prefer?-AlfafaFloozy

-I'm an American that was born and raised in the south. It's an obvious dialect. Also, English is a 2nd language for most people here. Language barriers are not uncommon. All of this comes into the revenge. Years ago, I worked in a call center. It was a large company with English and Spanish departments. I worked in the English department, but sat next to our Spanish department. I handled billing. No one calls billing in a good mood, but in general they're angry with the company not the rep. You calm them down, fix the issue, and you're off to the next call. Few customers are memorable, but this one I will never forget and I still laugh. This call happened on a busy day with long wait times. This just made the revenge sweeter.The call went like this.

Me: Thank you for calling blah blah blah.

Lady: I want an American on the phone.

Me: What?

Lady: I said I want an AMERICAN on the phone.

Me: Mam, I'm an American.

Lady: I WANT AN AMERICAN ON THE PHONE!

At this point, I can only assume I'm not speaking the right language.

Me: Un momento por favor

I put her on hold, transfer her over to the Spanish line, and just giggled to myself.

BUT IT DIDN'T END THERE. The lines were starting to calm down and I was chatting with one of the Spanish reps when his desk mate pops up and says she's got a psycho on the phone. IT WAS THE WOMAN I HAD TRANSFERRED!!! She was going BALLISTIC! The Spanish rep had her on mute while talking to us. I apologized and told her what happened. She started laughing. Then looks right at me and said "I'm gonna put her back in the Spanish queue". The Spanish department had a blast laughing at this crazy b*tch as they kept putting her back in the queue. I don't know if she ever got her issue fixed. Then again, we never found out what the issue was either. She was too busy yelling at everyone. Moral of the story, be nice to phone reps.

8.) Shoplifting don't pay-Erik069

-When I was in high school I worked as a stocker in a grocery store. One hot Saturday I’m stocking the ice cream freezer and saw a young women grab a couple ice-cream bars and shove them in her shorts. Quickly I found my manger and told him what I’d seen. I pointed out the women as she was walking out of the store, he went running. Caught up with her. I watched from the store entry as he chatted with her for a few minutes in the hot parking lot. I wondering what the heck they where talking about. As the manager is walking back to the store I see her reach in her shorts and toss the bars into the landscape planter. His revenge was to tell her the store was doing a survey and had some customer survey questions for her. Probably being scared she cooperated. When he saw melting ice cream running down her legs he finished the interview. Thanked her and came back into the store. We had a good laugh over his creative way to punish this shoplifter.

9.) Troublesome customer has to get her refund...50 miles away-Joelovesbacon97

-Before I start, for some background, I work at customer service as a department lead and I'll say my hardware store practices the rule that says "we reserve the right to refuse and limit any returns for any reasons" very often. With that being said... A Karen slithered into my store with a water heater that was around $800, She hissed at us "I want to return it" I asked if she had a receipt, she ask why does she need one and I said to do the refund, since it was over $50, we would for sure need a proof of purchase, she groaned and dug around in her purse and called me a moron and etc, she was already rude for no apparent reason.

I was kind of already in a pissy mood that day so I decided I'd have some fun with her being an a**hole by being an a**hole back to her. When she presented the receipt, I looked at the receipt to find any possible reason to deny her return and saw it! It was bought at a store 50+ miles away, with items that expensive we normally ask the customer to return to point of sale. So I told her "you can't return this item at this store, you need to return this item at the point of sale, which is the riverside store" when she heard this she hissed at me in anger something to the effect of "NO I WANT TO RETURN IT HERE I AM NOT DRIVING THAT FAR FOR A REFUND!” She proceeded to yell at me and my associates further, calling us rather offensive names and whatnot, until she asked for a Manager, so I got one, but I made sure to call my manager who has the same mindset of denying returns just like me. When my boss came, he saw what was going on, and he was on my side, he told her the same thing I said and she cursed us all out and slithered off to hell. As soon as she went off to the parking lot, we all began to laugh :)

10.) My two cents on this-/jzimm79

-I work retail and part of that is ringing customers up for their purchases. Occasionally you’ll get a total of 9.02 and the customer will pay with a ten. Normally I’ll give them a dollar instead of counting out .98. Today I gave a customer the dollar instead of a handful of change and he asked for another dollar because one corner was slightly torn. Instead of giving him a new dollar I gave him a handful of change. Oh the look on his entitled face. That tiny bit of revenge will get me thru this day.

11.) Waiting is the hardest part...for hard work-lupin_stargazer

-I work a crappy retail job, and we just started putting out our christmas stock (It kills me to say that when it isn't even Halloween yet). I was working the register while my coworker was in the back room handling a delivery. It was a quiet night, no customers for about half an hour, and in walks a woman with her three year old daughter. They start looking in the christmas aisle. I happen to walk by it about ten minutes later, and the aisle is completely trashed. I watch as her daughter pulls three pegs worth of garland off the wall, then as her mother picks out the color she wants and leaves the rest on the floor. This woman had allowed her daughter to do this for nearly everything in the aisle.

She saw me, took her daughters hand and said "Come on honey, lets go check out while this nice lady cleans up." And she leads her kid toward the check out. Well, jokes on you, lady. I'm the only one working them tonight! I start cleaning the aisle (very slowly) while she waits at the register. After a few minutes, the lady looks at me and clears her throat. I look up, smile and say "I'm sorry, but company policy states that I can't leave any obstruction in an aisle unattended. I'll be with you as soon as I can." And I go back to cleaning. Made her wait for a good twenty minutes trying to entertain a bored, increasingly whiny toddler before I came up and wrang her stuff up. I made sure to give her my biggest smile as I handed her her change and said "Have a nice night!".

12.) The change-man strikes no more-PM_YOUR_PRETTY_FACE

-I work overnights in a gas station in a particularly bad part of town. So from 11pm-6am I use a pass through drawer to make transactions so I don't get shot or robbed. This one a**hole shows up a couple times a week and gets at least 20 dollars in gas, and maybe 10-15 bucks in other stuff. How does he pay? By just dumping a handful of change into the drawer, making me pick it all up. Even if I have my hand out, he'll go under my hand and throw it in the drawer. That pissed me off like you wouldn't believe, so I started being rude back to him. I don't give him his stuff until I pick up each coin piece by piece and then count it all out and put it in the drawer. I'm talking like $30 in quarters and dimes and nickels so it takes a good five minutes. One time I was doing it, he says "Come the f**k on man, I'm in a hurry!" I just said "Yeah?" and kept going while he huffed and puffed and swore and paced back and forth. After 5 or 6 times of this, he started paying only in bills. I win :)

13.) Today was your last "free meal comp" from us-blobley

-I'll start off by saying that I take pride in cooking customers orders to perfection, and I strive to always make the customer happy. It's hard to do that when the person calls back every time no matter what and says that we messed their order up in some way. Well today sir, today was your last meal from us. I deleted your account and blocked all of your numbers that you have ever called us from. When you call, you will get a never ending elevator music tone. I also took the liberty of emailing every pizza place in a 3 mile radius of our store to inform them of your selfish habit. I told them what you do, and how many times you have done it to us. Hope you like Chinese food from now on f***er.

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